1. Make a Declaration to Stop Fighting

The marriage may or may not have been in trouble for a long time, or there might have been a single incident that brought the “D” word to the forefront. Whatever the case is, once it is spoken, couples often find themselves in verbal battles. This is a very critical time and emotions are high. You need to decide that you will not do any more damage to the marriage with words or arguing. Keep a journal or log of your thoughts, hurts, or fears and bring it with you to marriage therapy so that you can have a safe place to talk it out. A marriage therapist will teach you both how to get your points across without being mean, blaming, or causing harm.

2. Consult A Professional for Marriage Help

These top five tips to save a marriage from divorce won’t work alone. You also need to talk to someone who can guide your marriage in the right direction. If you or your spouse is discussing divorce, then you can’t simply rely on yourselves to fix what’s wrong in your marriage. If you had the qualifications to be a marriage therapist, then you wouldn’t be reading this for help. Put your ego aside for this one and find a marriage therapist that is trained in specific couples’ therapy techniques. The Gottman Method, for example, is a world-renowned marriage therapy technique based on years of research and data. Your marriage is worth the time and the extra expense of hiring a professional who can offer you the best support.

3. Give Undivided Attention

You might be tempted to avoid your spouse and disengage from your relationship during this time. Running away to friends and family provides short-term relief and allows a temporary escape from marriage issues. This just isn’t the best answer for how to save a failing marriage. Assuming that you and your partner have agreed the marriage is worth saving, then this is the time you will need to begin to rebuild what has been damaged. That means that you will have to practice the lessons you learn in marriage therapy and follow through with each other outside of session. Making a commitment to each other again means that your marriage is important and does come first.

4. Listen More

When you first got together, you both spent a lot of time getting to know one another and listening a lot. The art of active listening goes a long way and helps in the process of building trust, friendship, and intimacy again. You don’t have to agree with everything your partner says, or even understand their point of view. Being a good listener means that you care enough to set your own feelings or opinions aside. It provides a safe place for the other person to process things. Marriage therapy emphasizes techniques for couples to learn to communicate, respect, and trust one another again.

5. Learn to Self-Soothe

This skill of self-soothing is an all too often neglected self-help tool that could help you in so many situation, but especially during marital conflict. Any marriage therapist in Orlando will tell you that if you want to save a marriage from divorce you need to learn to calm yourself down before acting out. You should never look to your partner for excessive reassurance or to alleviate your insecurities. You have to learn to find healthy ways to soothe yourself so that you do not overwhelm your partner and push them away. You would be surprised at how easy it is to practice this skill and how effective it can be in improving your relationships.